How Lava Lamps Made Sex Boring Again

Walker described the lamp as “Freudian” and evocative of the primordial ooze, because apparently no one bothered to take him aside and say, “It’s just a lamp, Ed.”

McCarthyism Was Driven by a Lot of Bluster, Paranoia, and Hearsay, Which for Legal Purposes Is a Fact Unrelated to the Present Political Moment

These hearings, like everything McCarthy had done up to this point, were fueled mainly by McCarthy’s desire to further his own career.

Why Tickle Me Elmo Is the Key to Understanding Our Current Political Chaos (Sort Of)

It was obviously a touch ironic that Sesame Street, as a show created for poor inner-city kids, was inspiring such rabid suburban consumerism, but at the time, it was actually exactly what Sesame Street needed.

No, There Isn’t a Global Satanic Cult That Ritually Abuses Millions of Children, but for a Long Time We All Really Wanted to Believe There Was

It’s not really a mystery why people yearn to believe bizarre and dramatic tales of evil: the actual truth about evil is that it’s mundane, pervasive, and unfixable, at least to us mortals.

Why Tulips Briefly Cost More Than Mansions

If you don’t have any sort of hope beyond death, the absurdity of everything tends to hit you hard. And then you end up doing stupid stuff, like betting the family farm on a bunch of tulips.

Virtual Reality was Virtually Real, for About Five Minutes in the Nineties

Ultimately, the problem with VR was that it, like so much that happened in the nineties, put technology ahead of content.

In the Middle Ages, Dance Crazes Were Literal, Actual Crazes

Accounts of unstoppable, contagious dancing fools date as far back as the seventh century, and hail from nearly all parts of Europe.

This Lent, Let’s Fast from Toilet Paper (No, For Real)

Let’s give generously to the ones who need it and the ones who are helping. And maybe, I dunno, put that giant pack of Quilted Northern back on the rack.

Pet Rocks Were Actually a Thing, and Were Almost Political in How Apolitical They Were

Dahl wasn’t selling people rocks—not really—he was selling them a joke.

On the Third Day of Christmas, CAPC Gave to Me: Three Memes a-Meme-ing

Every once in a while, the internet still manages to provide a bit of clarity to (semi-) important issues.

The Saint Who Baptized Herself in a Tank of Rabid Sea Lions

Having thus cheated death twice, you might think that Thecla would abandon Christianity in favor of staying alive, but of course you’d be wrong.

Why the John 3:16 “Rainbow Man” Is Serving Multiple Life Sentences

We all expect to have important, dramatic lives. We all think we’ll turn out to be heroes. We’re just like Rainbow Man.

No, Easter Isn’t Pagan, Either: A Very D-List Saints Holiday Sequel (The Gritty Reboot)

So, if Easter did coincide with an Anglo-Saxon feast to a goddess no one’s ever heard of—well, I mean, coincidences happen.

The Time Communion Wafers and Wine Turned into Bloody Human Remains

It’s called the “Miracle of Lanciano,” mostly because “Holy crap, we have bleeding human remains on the altar” isn’t particularly catchy.

How to Practice Virtue (by Chasing Hookers Away with Red-Hot Pokers)

The great thinkers of the Mediterranean have already identified the seven virtues and how you can acquire them! It doesn’t get much easier than that.

How the Founder of American Evangelicalism Was Felled by Dirty Magazines

In the end, it wasn’t being at odds with his board of elders that brought Jonathan Edwards down—it was dirty magazines. Because, isn’t it always dirty magazines?