My Top 5 Most Disturbing Box Office Successes of 2008

1. Beverly Hills Chihuahua – I died a little inside just typing that.

2. Mama Mia – It’s the gift that you can’t take back and just keeps on giving, with lyrics at the bottom of the screen so everyone can sing along, and with a top-selling soundtrack, and with a lead who sings like a water buffalo (I have to admit, I’m pretty sure I stole the water buffalo thing from a review I read somewhere).

3. You Don’t Mess with the Zohan – Gay jokes and making fun of foreigners! A romping good time that requires a shower afterwards!

4. Fool’s Gold – Apparently Matthew McConaughey sometimes takes his shirt off. And apparently it’s box-office gold. That’s where they got the name from. Apparently.

5. Hancock – Okay I’ll admit it. I saw this one. But the shaky camera work was the director’s desperate attempt to convince us there was something worthwhile and unique in the disappointing film that should have been so much better.